Multiply the Love - Double the Bonding

by Heather Long | More from this Blogger

10 Apr 2006 12:00 PM

While I am not the mother of multiples, I did do some research into it because during the early portion of my pregnancy, they heard two heartbeats. For about six or seven weeks, we were under the impression that we were going to be parenting twins.

When it comes to preemie twins, the bonding process can be slowed by the need for Neo-Natal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). With some preemies, they are so small and with premature infants, there is the fear that they will not make it. There is a lot of energy that is taken up when you are recovering from the birth and trying to learn about everything that is going on with your twins.

Even if your twins are identical, their medical issues may be different. If you've ever seen a NICU, then you know there are a lot of people there. Nurses, caregivers and other parents are monitoring all the babies. It can be hard to let down your guard and reach out to the pair of tiny infants under that kind of strain.

The best piece of advice that experts and physicians can give parents of premature newborn twins is that any bonding you do during that time is good for both you and your babies. Even if all you can do is stroke them gently with a fingertip wrapped in a latex glove, do that. Speak softly, but speak to them.

Babies recognize the sounds of their parents' voices. They will also recognize the tone of voice. This not only helps your babies, but it also helps you to begin the bonding process. Stay in touch with your pediatricians and nurses, because the moment they will let you hold the babies - it's time to hold them.

You may only be able to hold the babies one at a time, but take the time with each one. Mom and Dad should both be able to hold them, that will allow them to experience not only the tactile sensation of touch, but also the support of their love. Dad bonding is a important to twins as it is to singles. With twins, however, having Dad there to share in the holding can keep Mom or Dad from feeling like either baby has been ignored.

Another suggestion for time spent by premature twins in the NICU - ask for co-bedding if possible. Let the babies share space together and you can even have them positioned as they were in the womb. Feet to head, head to head, back to back - however they were placed. Remember, the twins are very used to being together - so when they are in a situation such as the NICU where holding time is limited - giving them the comfort of companionship of their sibling can increase their chances and happiness.

Learn more about Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago.

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