Is My Baby Gifted? How to Tellby Valorie Delp | More from this Blogger 15 Dec 2007 04:52 AM I have been reading with great interest in the forums stories of moms everywhere whose children seem advanced. I have watched with great interest those parents on the Upper East Side who vie for that one coveted spot in the highly selective preschools. My husband and I are often bemused by the parents who sign their kids up for his "advanced" sports class because, after all, their child is really advanced. I hate to break it to all those moms out there whose toddlers are doing things earlier than other children--but your child is probably not gifted. She may do well in school, or he may be a natural on the basketball court but there is a great big learning curve during those toddler years and 'normal' encompasses a variety of ages. Which means that in all likelihood, your child is no more gifted than the child down the block who doesn't do any of the things that your child does. Are There Markers of Giftedness This Young? Yes, there can be signs that your toddler is gifted at a very young age. Children who are gifted often read earlier with little to no instruction, or pick up some other skill much earlier. In my own experience, there seems to be a certain intuitiveness that goes along with being gifted. However, hitting developmental markers early is not always a sign that your little one is gifted. Girls in general, tend to hit markers earlier than boys and oldest children (children who have mommy or daddy all to themselves) also tend to do things earlier. Having an 'advanced' child now, doesn't even guarantee academic success later on. My Own Experience I have two children who have been identified as highly gifted. Their giftedness is clear, but in different areas. Neither of them have hit the typical developmental markers particularly early. In fact my son, who I've written about in the homeschooling blog, hit most of his developmental markers on the later end of normal. It wasn't until he started schooling that we realized he was unusually bright. My other gifted child, is one of the twins, and she has shown clear signs of being gifted already. On the other hand, I have had one child hit all of her developmental markers very early and she is not gifted. She is very bright, but not gifted. All this to say, hitting developmental milestones left and right is a characteristic of toddlerhood, not of being gifted. Gifted or not, the best thing you can do for your child is provide plenty of play time, read aloud time, music and art. You do not need to worry at this young of an age how to further 'stimulate' your child. By simply being with you and interacting with you, your toddler is getting all he needs for a great start! Learn more about Valorie Delp  Hello everybody! My name is Valorie and I am one busy lady! When I'm not writing or editing for families, I am busy trying to get my brood of 5 in line. Relevantbaby tags User Comments HomeschoolDad (10) 28 Dec 2007 01:59 PMValerie, I'm very sorry, but this is absolute horsepuckey. If someone believes that their baby is gifted, and believes it to the hilt, they'll find themselves a self-fulfilling prophecy. Interestingly enough, if they believe their baby is not gifted, they will also find themselves with accurate crystal balls. I take harsh exception to the frankly irresponsible phrasing, "your child is probably not gifted." Why in the world would you want to encourage parents into the delusion that their child is anything other than gifted? "Your child is no more gifted than the child down the block." Possibly not, but since every child is gifted in at least some way, perhaps the parents down the block have made the same mistake and not believed in their child's inborn abilities either. I have some further critique. When a child hits developmental milestones "early", nurturing this development allows the child to practice upon these skills for *longer* than the children who don't quite get it. More practice makes more nearly perfect. What I suspect is happening in the anectodal evidence you offer happens in the presence of a school system, or at least in some kind of system of mass instruction. If a skill, developed early relative to other kids, is not nurtured effectively, that child will be forced to relax scholastically. Forced to relax? It sounds contradictory, but that was my observation going through public school. When a child excels, it is because she's interested in the subject matter. When she's not interested -- say, if she's run out of available material -- she's going to get very bored with topics which once fascinated. At some point, if the child is not self-motivated, the hare goes to sleep until the tortoise catches up. I don't think this problem applies so very much in homeschooling situations, because of the individualized instruction. I fully recognize that no kid is going to be gifted at everything, but the trick is to find the gifts that the child has to bear.  Valorie Delp (49340) 28 Dec 2007 02:10 PMThanks for your comment. What I am referring to in my blog is "giftedness" as defined by a test or measurement of some sort. I certainly understand that children have different strengths and that every child has something that they are strong in. In my mind that's not he same as being gifted. Parents of children who are actually gifted. . .extradinarily so. . .often find great difficulty in finding resources bc "everyone" thinks their child is gifted. Not every child is, at least not in this manner. Discuss this article
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