Have Mercy on the Twin Moms!!!

by Valorie Delp | More from this Blogger

30 Apr 2007 08:29 PM

If you've ever done this or are guilty of doing it I will state up front that I forgive you. While I realize not all MOMs (mothers of multiples) are like me, I belong to a few forums for twin mommies and I have to tell you that the majority of us. . .well, we are. Especially those of us who are watching twins and other children at the same time. As shocking as it may seem, we don't love all the attention that comes with taking the twins out in public. In fact, when moms of multiples see each other out and about, often we simply give the slight nod and may simply acknowledge, "Oh I have twins, they're so many months old."

But there's something about twins that simply attracts attention. People love to talk to twins, and twin moms. I can't speak for others (although I'm sure every mom feels this way) but mine are especially cute walking around Manhattan waving at everyone and everything. My twins even cracked a smile out of the meter maid by waving emphatically and calling out "Hellooooooooo!" (If you knew the meter maid, you would know what a feat this is--I think frowning is a requirement of her uniform.)

However, you must know that we twin moms don't like being stopped that much. We especially don't like talking about ovulating, explaining the difference between fraternal and identical twins (which for me, inevitably leads to an argument over whether or not mine are or are not). We also don't love it when people ask about the aggressive and the shy one--they are not nor must they be exact opposites.

The twins do not love having their cheeks pinched and in fact, I must warn you that if you see us and feel the urge--Emily in particular might bite. Ordinarily this would not be acceptable behavior, but I can hardly blame Emily when the 'bited' didn't take the hint as she was quickly backing away. Ordinarily I would've felt embarrassed at such a display of poor people skills, but really all I could say was, "Yep--looks like you found the aggressive one!"

I leave you with one final thought: Do unto others' twins as you would have others do unto your child!

Learn more about Valorie Delp

Hello everybody! My name is Valorie and I am one busy lady! When I'm not writing or editing for families, I am busy trying to get my brood of 5 in line.

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Sara Denomme (1063) 04 May 2007 05:20 PM

Oh Valerie - I imagine it's twice as hard as having one adorable bundle for strangers to coo at! LOL. Yesterday my friend and I were out with our two babies. Hers is three months younger. TWICE we were asked if they were twins!! UH- what?!! Must have been because we were both wearing them in a meitei carrier, but still, what sillyness.

saihem21 (10) 16 Feb 2008 12:35 AM

I love this article. As a mother of twins I have lived this. My twins are boy/girl and people will say "Oh, a boy and a girl. Are they identicle??? to which I always say, "Nope different parts." Now they are approching 5 and people aren't sure they are twins so they say "Looks like you had them pretty close together." -"Yep about 1 minute apart." But my favorite line of all has always been "It could of been triplets." Usually said after my son has dismantled the closes electrical socket. Thanks for the laugh

Valorie Delp (49340) 16 Feb 2008 05:53 AM

Yeah. . .I think I may soon write an article of the definition of identical. It seems to elude people when referring to twins. LOL

deedee1231 (4030) 17 Feb 2008 11:04 AM

Even twins who don't look like twins bring out some wacky behavior in people. The other day at the dental office I actually had another lady in the waiting room tell her son that my daughters are not twins, after my twins told the boy that they were. I (politely) smiled and asserted that, yes, the girls are fraternal twins. She sniffed at me, turned away from us, and loudly whispered to her son to stay in his seat --basically telling him not to play with the crazy non-twin sisters anymore!!

Valorie Delp (49340) 17 Feb 2008 07:15 PM

Yeah. . .it seems to be a really common misconception that twins MUST look alike.

EmmaAbby (10) 14 Jan 2009 06:35 PM

Im so glad Im not the only one that gets questions that aren't very....well....smart. I have a friend with identical twin girls and she was actually asked if they were conjoined. I think if you dont know the definition of the word conjoined or identical that maybe you should keep your questions to yourself. My girls are 22 months and we have been stopped so much that if the cart stops for more than a few seconds they start saying "go, go".

Valorie Delp (49340) 14 Jan 2009 06:51 PM

Yep--it gets better though as they get older. Now mine move in oppostive directions and people don't realize that they are twins. There's another article like this somewhere around here. . .