Friday Baby Funnies: Fun Advice for Babies

by Heather Long | More from this Blogger

27 Oct 2006 08:14 AM

Good evening and Happy Friday to you and yours. I'm a bit late diving into the baby blog today, but I didn't want you to think that I'd forgotten about the need for humor and baby fun on Friday. So without further ado, here is some Friday Fun Advice for Babies:

• Should you have a baby after 35? Consider that 35 babies is enough!
• The most reliable method for determining a baby's sex is childbirth
• When you're pregnant, when will your baby move? For most parents, they'll have great luck if he or she moves after college
• Childbirth instructors describe the sensation of labor as being pressure and not pain; that's like saying a tornado is just an air current
• Dads wondering whether they should be in the delivery room or not should consider whether the words 'alimony' mean anything to them or not
• When recovering from childbirth, you may wonder what you should avoid doing - becoming pregnant is a good one
• When do parents return to normal after a baby is born? Usually after the kids go to college?

Choosing a Baby Name

When you are picking out the name you want to give your child, consider applying the following three tests:

• Go to the backdoor and shout it out
• Practice using the first and middle names in conjunction with the last - you'll need to be able to do this clearly at some point
• Say the name choice with every dirty word you know, if any of them rhyme - scratch it off your list

The Last Little Girl

Recently a mom took her baby girl to the supermarket and she dressed her all up in a pink outfit with pink booties and a pink cap. As she was done with her shopping and went to get in line, she noticed the harassed looking mother ahead of her with the three or four year old son. The boy was obviously arguing with his mother and she said no two or three times. Finally, she raised her voice to him and said "No we can't get you a baby sister while we're here, she got the last one."

Related Articles:

Friday Baby Funnies: Pigtails

Out of the Mouths Of Babes

My Dog Ate My Sunglasses & Other Fun Stuff

Learn more about Heather Long

Heather Long is 35 years old and currently lives in Wylie, Texas. She has been a freelance writer for six years. Her husband and she met while working together at America Online over ten years ago.

View Full Profile | More from this Blogger